jakeem

"Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son." -- Faber College's Dean Wormer (John Vernon) to Delta Tau Chi pledge Kent Dorfman (Stephen Furst) -- a.k.a. "Flounder" -- in "National Lampoon's Animal House" (1978).

"Never apologize, mister. It's a sign of weakness." -- U.S. Cavalry Captain Nathan Brittles (John Wayne) in "She Wore a Yellow Ribbon" (1949).

"At my signal, unleash hell." -- Roman General Maximus Decimus Meridius (Russell Crowe), preparing for battle against Germanic tribes in "Gladiator" (2000).

"You're good, kid, but as long as I'm around, you're second best." -- Card sharp Lancey Howard (Edward G. Robinson) to the title character played by Steve McQueen in "The Cincinnati Kid" (1965).

Why wouldn't it be Farley Granger?

"I'm my own best friend!" -- Barf (John Candy), the mog -- half man, half dog -- from Mel Brooks' "Spaceballs" (1987).

"Don't you know any better than to wake a man up at two o'clock in the afternoon?" -- Private detective Philip Marlowe (Humphrey Bogart) to Chief Inspector Bernie Ohls (Regis Toomey) in "The Big Sleep" (1946).

"When a man's partner is killed, he's supposed to do something about it." -- Private detective Sam Spade (Humphrey Bogart) in "The Maltese Falcon' (1941).

"Remember, you're fighting for this woman's honor, which is probably more than she ever did." -- Rufus T. Firefly (Groucho Marx) in "Duck Soup" (1933).

"Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore." -- Dorothy Gale (Judy Garland) in "The Wizard of Oz" (1939).

"Earn this." -- U.S. Army Rangers Captain John H. Miller (Tom Hanks) to PFC James Francis Ryan (Matt Damon) in "Saving Private Ryan" (1998).

"My! People come and go so quickly here!" -- Dorothy Gale (Judy Garland) in "The Wizard of Oz" (1939).

"According to history, over 100 years ago, a man named Albert Shanker got ahold of a nuclear warhead.” -- Dr. Agon (John McLiam) in Woody Allen's futuristic comedy "Sleeper" (1973), explaining to 20th-century transplant Miles Monroe (Allen) how the old world order was destroyed. NOTE: When "Sleeper" was released, Shanker (1928-1997) was the combative head of the United Federation of Teachers (UFT) -- the labor union that represented most teachers in New York City public schools.

"We'll make it past the cops -- I just hope we don't see no Muslims." -- Grover Muldoon (Richard Pryor) to George Caldwell (Gene Wilder), who is disguised in blackface in "Silver Streak" (1976).

"That Texican ... saved my neck twice -- once after he was dead." -- U.S. Marshal Rooster Cogburn (John Wayne), referring to the heroic Texas Ranger LaBoeuf (Glen Campbell) in "True Grit" (1969).

"If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits 88 miles per hour... you're gonna see some serious stuff." -- Dr. Emmett Brown (Christopher Lloyd) in "Back to the Future." The film opened 30 years ago, on July 3, 1985. NOTE: This is what he said in the version that aired on network television!

"By the way, there's a name for you ladies, but it isn't used in high society -- outside of a kennel." -- Crystal Allen (Joan Crawford) in "The Women" (1939).

"Nobody's ever gone the distance with Creed, and if I can go that distance, you see, and that bell rings and I'm still standin', I'm gonna know for the first time in my life, see, that I weren't just another bum from the neighborhood." -- Rocky Balboa (Sylvester Stallone) to Adrian Pennino (Talia Shire) in "Rocky" (1976).

TCM On Demand for May 27, 2015 The following features are now available on TCM On Demand for a limited time: 1. Birdman of Alcatraz (1962) -- Burt Lancaster, Karl Malden, Thelma Ritter, Neville Brand, Betty Field, Telly Savalas, Edmond O'Brien, Hugh Marlowe, Whit Bissell, Crahan Denton, James Westerfield. Uncredited: Leo Penn, Chris Robinson. John Frankenheimer's biopic about prison lifer-turned-ornithologist Robert Stroud (1890-1963) earned Oscar nominations for Lancaster (Best Actor, as Stroud), Savalas (Best Supporting Actor), Ritter (Best Supporting Actress) and Best Cinematography (Burnett Guffey). Ritter's nomination was her sixth and last. She is tied with Glenn Close and Deborah Kerr for the most Oscar nods by a female without ever winning. The somewhat fictionalized tale follows Stroud's transformation from hardened criminal -- he was convicted of two murders -- to brilliant and accomplished bird expert. Malden co-stars Harvey Shoemaker, the hard-nosed warden of Leavenworth who clashes with Stroud on more than one occasion. Ritter plays the controlling mother who dislikes the woman (Field) Stroud marries in prison. Brand appears as the prison guard who becomes as trusting of the inmate as anyone could. Savalas is a fellow Leavenworth inmate who learns to like birds. O'Brien plays the writer who takes an interest in Stoud's case. The movie's title is a bit of a misnomer because Stroud was no longer allowed to have pets by the time he was transferred to the prison island of Alcatraz in the 1950s. Expires June 2, 2015. 2. The Count of Monte Cristo (1934) -- Robert Donat, Elissa Landi, Louis Calhern, Sidney Blackmer, Raymond Walburn, O.P. Heggie, Irene Hervey, Georgia Caine, Walter Walker, Lawrence Grant, Luis Alberni, Douglas Walton, Juliette Compton, Clarence Wilson, Eleanor Phelps, Ferdinand Munier, Holmes Herbert, Paul Irving, Mitchell Lewis, Clarence Muse, Lionel Belmore, William Farnum. Uncredited: Leon Ames, Paul Fix. In this film adaptation of the 1844 French novel by Alexandre Dumas the Elder, Donat stars as the revenge-seeking Edmond Dantès. Wrongfully imprisoned for several years because of political reasons, Dantès manages to escape and recover a hidden treasure. Thanks to these fortunate circumstances, he changes his identity and uses his newfound wealth to become a powerful man in France. He then sets out to reward his friends and take vengeance on his enemies. The film was co-written and directed by Rowland V. Lee ("The Son of Frankenstein," "The Bridge of San Luis Rey"). The story has been told many times in feature films and on television. The versions range from the 1922 silent film "Monte Cristo," starring John Gilbert, to a 2002 screen adaptation starring Jim Caviezel. Movie crossover reference: This film is a favorite of the masked freedom fighter played by Hugo Weaving in the 2006 drama "V for Vendetta," set in a dystopian British society of the future. He introduces the black-and-white movie to his protégée -- and potential successor -- Evey Hammond (Natalie Portman). Expires June 2, 2015.

"I was just inches from a clean getaway." -- Astronaut Garrett Breedlove (Jack Nicholson) in "Terms of Endearment" (1983), after Aurora Greenway (Shirley MacLaine) wants a reaction to her declaration of love.

TCM On Demand for May 27, 2015 The following feature is now available on TCM On Demand for a limited time: 3. The Crimson Pirate (1952) -- Burt Lancaster, Nick Cravat, Eva Bartok, Torin Thatcher, James Hayter, Leslie Bradley, Margot Grahame, Noel Purcell, Frederick Leister, Eliot Makeham, Frank Pettingell, Dana Wynter (billed as Dagmar Wynter), Sir Christopher Lee, Ewan Roberts, John Chandos, Derek Tansley, Charles Farrell. Lancaster effectively drew on his background as an acrobat in this Technicolor swashbuckler about 18th-century Caribbean-based buccaneers. Directed by Robert Siodmak ("The Spiral Staircase," "The Killers"), the film stars the athletic actor as Captain Vallo, whose bold actions make life difficult for the British Navy. Vallo's right-hand man, a mute crewman named Ojo, is played by Lancaster's longtime acrobatic partner Cravat. Expires June 2, 2015.

"His god IS God." -- Rameses II (Yul Brynner) to Nefretiri (Anne Baxter) in "The Ten Commandments" (1956).

"Mind if my friend sits this one out? She's just dead!" -- James Bond (Sir Sean Connery), disposing of villainess Fiona Volpe (Luciana Paluzzi) in "Thunderball" (1965).

"Kid, the next time I say, 'Let's go someplace like Bolivia,' let's go someplace like Bolivia." -- Butch Cassidy (Paul Newman) in "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid" (1969).

"A man's got to know his limitations." -- San Francisco Police Inspector Harry Callahan (Clint Eastwood) in "Magnum Force" (1973).