CaveGirl

Most books talking about bad movies, with titles like "Golden Turkey Awards" focus on pathetic, little B to Z-grade films where the progenitor had no money to speak of, no crew, no actors and maybe no sense. And yet, occasionally even with nothing, a likable film emerges which one can enjoy just for the silliness it is. Such books will often pan the actors as being without a grain of talent and totally disdain them, as if they should be of the calibre of Sir Peter O'Toole in proficiency. I think this is unfair, because for me to qualify as being of the grade of "Really Bad Acting" I think it should be awarded to one who has everything going for them, an A-script, a boatload of money fueling the production, Class A actors and directors leading the production and so on. If, with all that, you still stink, then you must be a really bad actor. My first nomination for one of these awards, is Ali MacGraw. I had truly forgotten how horrid are her less than stellar onscreen talents, as soon as she opens her mouth. Now I will agree, she looks great and I really admire her style, but from the moment she opened her mouth in "Goodbye Columbus" I was speechless at how truly rotten an actor she is, no matter what the subject matter. Over the weekend, I had the ignominious experience of viewing this monstrosity of lackluster abilities in the movie "Convoy". I had never seen this debacle, due to being that at that time knowing any movie with Ali was not worth watching, but it is still hard to imagine with Peckinpah at the helm, that again, MacGraw could be this disastrously bottom of the barrel bad. I actually felt sorry for Kris Kristofferson as he tried to engage with her in her scenes. Now I have nothing against Ali, and she's probably a nice person but her acting is so bad, it makes me almost want to scream whenever she tries to emote in anything. As I stated before, I've seen wacky substitutions of non-actors in roles, like wasn't it Ed Wood's dentist that he used in "Plan 9 from Outer Space" to sub for Bela, after the poor old guy died during filming? I'm sure if this dentist had even had to say one line, he would be better than MacGraw. Look at all the totally non-actors who are picked by directors like DeSica or others, who can totally seem believable with absolutely no training...and then watch any Ali MacGraw movie! So, that's the kind of really bad acting I am referring to, for you to submit to this thread. Not stuff in minor Z-grade Samuel Z. Arkoff films but totally high end, A-Grade films that still unfortunately have horrid performances by anyone.

He also went to Cambridge! Can you imagine if he had lived and could have been in a film with other Cambridge grads from Monty Python?

Your second to last paragraph reminds me of when I was visiting Rome and was standing inside the Colosseum looking down on the areas supposedly used for Damnatio ad Bestias activities. One of the gladiator guides walked up while some women were weeping about all the "Christians" who had been thrown to the lions, and he said "Don't believe everything you hear." Being that many scholars will admit that Christians were punished there with persecution possibly, but not for their faith, but many times for crimes of arson, lends one to question such legends. This would be like saying the police were after members of the Symbionese Liberation Army for their spiritual views when in reality it was really because of them setting fires and causing mayhem, which many scholars believe was one of the crimes of Christians at the time that got them chosen for punishment. If one wants to talk about persecution of victims, all they need do is read up on torture used by Catholic entities during the Inquisition based on Witchfinder General concepts found in the "Malleus Maleficarum". No one need chastize me for saying prejudicial remarks about Christianity or Catholicism, since I have had 16 continuous years of theological training in their constituency, which gives me the right to speak as one who knows where all the bodies are buried. Enjoyed reading your rebuttal, CineSage!

Please know your Nazis with correct spelling of their names. That would be Joseph Goebbels, Minister of Propaganda, not "Goebbles" which looks like a new cereal to gobble up from General Mills. General Mills, by the way was not a Nazi sympathizer as some has said, but just a nice man who went far in our military rooting out Nazis during the Big One.

In the world of art and artistic endeavors, it's always approved of to be subversive.

The funny thing about Bronson is, that I know many very quiet and non-violent little older ladies who seem to have a penchant for watching his films, especially ones like "Death Wish". I wonder why...?

Those British actors of the 1930's were all just so incredible and what would films be like without CAS playing the stiff upper lip, yet often kindly gentleman. He was so wonderful just to look at and hear his trained elocution enunciating anything in a film. I think I read once that he was satirized by Waugh in his book, "The Loved One" but it's been a while since I've seen the film, so don't remember which character. I wonder what the "C" stood for, as I've never checked. Great tribute to an actor who deserves much credit for all he brought to every film he was in, as you say, Lydecker.

Too much beefcake for the execs to deal with?

Great cast, especially with Crawford and Meeker along for the ride.

I can still remember seeing that for the first time in a theatre years after it was made, and the 3-D was so much more thrilling than the 3-D in like that Andy Warhol film, which would have like someone get impaled and the guy's organ would be jutting out over the audience, like a piece of meat at the butcher shop. Scenes in HOW with characters coming out of the shadows into dark and wet London streets were excellently done, if you just forget the wacky paddle ball scene at the opening of the Madame Tussaud-like museum.

I guess not. Or were you watching on an old Philco and the horizontal hold was off, Vautrin? I always thought Peter Falk looked like Garfield. Thanks!

Ya know, he can be very emotionally moving when he wants to be. Think of him in that tv episode with Elizabeth Montgomery. Thanks, James!

Yes, he is good in that film and I would have dated him over Redford, if I were Nat. Hey, can you imagine a greater combination than Tura Satana and Bronson as a couple in a film? I think not. Thanks!

I must have blocked that out of my film memory, Beth probably because Henry was so scary in that role!

Thanks, Sepia and I didn't realize the first five were uncredited.

OMG! Really? And I so hate having a good reputation. Thanks for the update! By the way, I think "The Mechanic" is a wonderful film. I like it almost as much as the movie "Two-Lane Blacktop".

Being that I've seen way too many movies, I don't have enough remaining to see to fill a bucket list, just a shotglass one, but in that vessel I would have to put the 1928 silent film, "Alraune". The story as written by Hanns Heinz Ewers has always intrigued me being of the legend of the mandrake root and some salacious details about what happens when men are hanged. Also called "Unholy Love" and some other titles, this film stars the great Brigitte Helm and Paul Wegener, which makes it a must see, plus it was lensed by Franz Planer, who filmed so many wondrous offbeat movies like "Letter From an Unknown Woman", "711 Ocean Drive" and "The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T" plus so many more famously conventional classics. Though I know it is available to possibly view on Youtube I'd still kill to own a dvd copy or see it screened in a real movie house. Name what's on your shotglass list, if you have seen way too many films already and are only missing a few oddities before you croak.

I think it could be. Gotta say, "House of Wax" has some of the best 3-D I've ever seen and the bit with Charles head looking like it is a wax one on the shelf, is a winner. Thanks, Eric!

Excellent choices and I can promise you that you will be picked to be working today as a longshoreman on the TCM docks, Stephan!

I own it on DVD but had totally forgotten this fact so thanks for your brilliant expose, Darrylfxanax!

I don't write these posts to be ignored so there had better be some responses by the time I get back next week or there will be Hades to pay. If you think this is a threat, you may be right. Just call me, Johnny Friendly...

Excuse me, TB? How much less could you care if Lili Marlena's masculinity appealed to women? Just messing with you...mea culpa! Ditrich is doomed probably to be described a bit as an androgynous entity appealing to both sexes like Garbo though in the annals of moviedom. I don't know deep down how important Von Sternberg's films are in the pantheon of films, but I do really enjoy his multi-layered visuals shot through material and with bizarre objects jutting into the visual field in an almost three-dimensional way. I guess any filmmaker who does something unique is one I admire in some ways. For me, my fave is for the above reasons, "The Scarlet Empress".

Thanks, Swithin for this pronouncing primer! I try to understand many of the different pronunciations of the same words, for Britain and America like "lieutenant" and "schedule" too, which are said so uniquely. These titles for royalty can be difficult to remember unless of course one watches way too much BBC produced shows on PBS! I remember being in London and getting in a cab [taxi?] and saying to the driver "Can you take me to...M-a-r-y-l-e-b-o-n-e Street?" which I was spelling out totally as I was afraid of pronouncing it incorrectly. The cabbie looks at me and says "Ow wud ya say it?" so I made an attempt and said something which sounded like "marley-bone" and he said "Yuv got it, luv!" He then refused to take me to Picadilly Circus but ended up giving me a map of London since he said I was not annoying like many American tourists there. I think he was being kind. I do like doing imitations of women on the radio broadcasting for the BBC, which is fun to do, since they have such uppercrust and clipped accents. The hardest dialects to copy though from British tv were those on the show "All Creatures Great and Small". My poor mother could never understand anything being said and needed me to translate or subtitles. Speaking of dukes and earls, I love that song about a special one called "The Duke of Earl" by Gene Chandler.

I love when movies have stars who have received no credits for the film. It's kind of like getting some extra sour cream for your taco salad, gratis...which is always good. The unbilled performance I enjoy most is Tony Curtis as Donald Baumgart in "Rosemary's Baby". There's the scene where Rosemary talks to him on the phone, and the first time I saw it, I kept thinking "Boy, that voice sounds so familiar." She has started by then being suspicious of Guy's involvement with the old couple neighbors and deviltry is invading her thoughts, being that Guy now has gotten the part that originally was Donald's. Curtis is just great sounding cynical about losing his sight and the part to Guy and puts a real nice spin on such a seemingly small, nothing throwaway which doesn't even have a visual. Polanski uses settings in the film, where one cannot even see when the phone is answered in the Woodhouse bedroom which adds to the mystery of the phone calls and the milieu. I always wait for this part in the movie, even if I am not really watching the whole thing, though it does usually pull me in. Any unbilled voice only or visual only or combination of both in a film, that impresses you?

For those who enjoy the artistic touch in films, "Pandora and the Flying Dutchman" is helmed by Albert Lewin who was always masterfully in charge and made films which are things of beauty to view, and this one is lensed by the great Jack Cardiff. Most of the shots are just breathtakingly gorgeous to view and savour. Thanks for the update, TB!