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hlywdkjk

The Annual FrankGrimes Torture Thread

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*Wow! What a privilege!...*

 

The privilege, and honor, is all mine. I admit I didn't remember when your day was...I just happen to do a drive-by and noticed all the bustle over the occasion. So I rustled up that cake (well, sort of)...and I even composed a limerick (a wholesome one) for the occasion but have withheld it out of compassion. Yes, pirates can sometimes exhibit compassion (though rarely), and they find it all the easier when they happen to be particularly bad poets. (I think I'll stick to plundering.)

 

*Well you know what?I threw my fake machete into the jungle b/c I thought it made me look mean. Heehee!*

 

Well, if you were in the jungle, it might behoove you to look a little mean. Maybe you'd better go back and find it. I'd go look for it for you but I'm afraid of bobcats.

 

L.

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Oh dear me, Little Miss Butterscotchie... my apologies!! It looks like I am a day late... but maybe I've brought enough tea and cakes for a second round of wishes, young'un. Hope your Birthday was SPLENDID! :-)

 

afternoontea460.jpg

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Hi Theresa. Happy Birthday! Sorry I'm late! I hope you had a nice tea party for your birthday! :)

 

afternoontea.jpg?t=1252316262

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I have been trying off and on all day yesterday to get here to wish you a Happy Birthday but the board wouldn't cooperate so I am passing it off as being fashionably late.

 

As my son's birthday was Sept. 4 this must be a good time of year. May you enjoy the whole week as part of your birthday celebration. You certainly deserve it.

 

peanuts_wideweb__470x307,0.jpg

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hey wait a minute! You watched Mrs. Miniver! It just clicked. For some reason I didn?t even notice that yesterday. How exciting is this!

 

DID HE????

 

Oops.... Sorry Jackie.. did not mean to post over your Birthday wishes....we must have been typing at the same time.... .

 

Message was edited by: rohanaka

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did he?!!!!!!

 

HA!! Inquiring minds wanna know...

 

But let's face it.. the sun did NOT stand still in the sky.... the rivers did NOT all run backwards and NO pigs flew (that I am aware of) so I am having my doubts..... HA! :P:P:P:P

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oh my goodness! you guys are starting to make me cry! ive never had so many birthday wishes before!

 

Thank you Chris, Larry, Kathy and Wendy for your good wishes! you were all on time, i was simply early. heehee!

 

i love all these exquisite pictures!

 

kathy, that looks so scrumptous. you surely know how to make a beautiful tea setting! wherever did you learn such a talent?

 

Chris, wish your son a happy birthday for me!

 

Larry, i had a very good tea party with all of you!

 

Wendy, ive already shot mr. grimes, but he never wants to die on me. ;) maybe you can help me.......and you know what? i dont mind if i do get a lesson from mr. darcy! heehee!

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good day Laffite!

 

*The privilege, and honor, is all mine. I admit I didn't remember when your day was...I just happen to do a drive-by and noticed all the bustle over the occasion. So I rustled up that cake (well, sort of)...and I even composed a limerick (a wholesome one) for the occasion but have withheld it out of compassion. Yes, pirates can sometimes exhibit compassion (though rarely), and they find it all the easier when they happen to be particularly bad poets. (I think I'll stick to plundering.)*

 

i love the cake...its very tasty too! :) well i was rather disappointed that i didnt get a poem! ;) ;)

 

*Well, if you were in the jungle, it might behoove you to look a little mean. Maybe you'd better go back and find it. I'd go look for it for you but I'm afraid of bobcats.*

 

i have my magical Lucy purse with me, i dont need to have a fake machete silly.

 

i thought pirates werent afraid of anything...most especially bobcats. you can fight it off with your sword of course! heehee!

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*good day Laffite!*

 

good day ButterScotchGreer, congrats on 5,000!

 

*i love the cake...its very tasty too! :) well i was rather disappointed that i didnt get a poem! ;) ;)*

 

I know a young lady called ButterScotchGreer

She is all the days of her life of such winning good cheer

Yet the fifth of September

Is a day to remember

For it?s the start of a new ButterScotch year.

 

I submitted this poem to the Pirate Poet Society (PPS) and was immediately stripped of my title as Pirate Poet Laureate of the Rolling Main. They wanted me to walk the plank but I bribed them with this excellent Jamaican rum that I purloined down in, uh, Jamaica. I have gotten myself out of so many jams with my rum and that?s why I take special care not to allow anyone to steal it (though I have not always succeeded). ;)

 

*i have my magical Lucy purse with me, i dont need to have a fake machete silly.*

 

Oh heck, I forgot. That's some lucy purse all right. I didn't know it was magical though.

 

*i thought pirates werent afraid of anything...most especially bobcats. you can fight it off with your sword of course! heehee!*

 

Well, most pirates. I?m kind of weird. Though I?ll admit I said that about the bobcats because I didn?t want to go look for a fake machete in the jungle during summertime (besides my sword is in the shop, I?m having blood stains removed.) BTW. don?t spread that around about being afraid of bobcats, my reputation, you know.

 

A few days ago Helen was interviewed by Charlie Rose. It turned out to be an interview of April 2008. I was disappointed, I had thought it was more recent. It?s not so easy to think of Helen and not think of MissB of Scotch at the same time. On how to find the truth of oneself Helen said, ?Well, not by looking for it,? which I found kind of cool. In case you never saw this interview, here is the link:

 

http://www.charlierose.com/view/interview/9032

 

laffite

 

//

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> {quote:title=laffite wrote:}{quote}

> A few days ago Helen was interviewed by Charlie Rose. It turned out to be an interview of April 2008. I was disappointed, I had thought it was more recent.

 

laffite,

Thanks for posting a link to that interview, I've never seen it before but I'm sure I'll enjoy it (as will all other Helen Mirren fans here). I just watched State of Play the other day and Helen was very good. If you haven't seen it, you should give it a try, you'd probably like it. :)

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Hey Laffite,

 

Good to see you back here again! Did you catch Gloria Grahame day in August?

 

I hope to see around these parts a little more regularly.

 

Molo

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Hi Molo, thank you for that. No, in fact, I didn't see any GG, I didn't even know they gave Gloriana a day. I should be put in the stocks for that one. Boy, I know how to miss'em. You and the other Gloriaphiles must have been in heaven. I want to reprise our discussion of Henry over on the BBC thread and hope to make a few remarks about my favorite wife (and his, I think), Miss Anne Seymour, sometime soon. Thanks again, Molo.

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Ha! No stocks for you. Missing Gloria is punishment enough. She had her day on the 13th of August which was also my birthday so that worked out great. It was exciting for all us GG fans.

 

I'll keep an eye on the BBC thread! :)

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*I know a young lady called ButterScotchGreer*

*She is all the days of her life of such winning good cheer*

*Yet the fifth of September*

*Is a day to remember*

*For it?s the start of a new ButterScotch year.*

 

Oh how sweet

You know very well how to tweet.

The cake was oh so scrumptious

Scrumptious as a cherry peach parfait

Though it may seem presumptuous

My tummy loves it so unruly

honest, truely it does.

 

okay, so i borrowed some parts to the Chitty Chitty Bang Bang song "Truly Scrumptious", but it still comes from the heart, silly pirate. heehee!

 

*I submitted this poem to the Pirate Poet Society (PPS) and was immediately stripped of my title as Pirate Poet Laureate of the Rolling Main. They wanted me to walk the plank but I bribed them with this excellent Jamaican rum that I purloined down in, uh, Jamaica. I have gotten myself out of so many jams with my rum and that?s why I take special care not to allow anyone to steal it (though I have not always succeeded).*

 

they might want to frame your poem in comparison to mine silly. heehee!

 

as for the rum......where did you fin it?! i must not have hidden it enough! golly gee, we cant have you going dancing around a campfire crazily singing silly songs!.......on the other hand it might be fun to watch. heehee! no, no, no you wont change my mind, the rum is gone!

 

*Oh heck, I forgot. That's some lucy purse all right. I didn't know it was magical though.*

 

oh, i thought your fake machete was magical. heehee! apparently it isnt.

 

*Well, most pirates. I?m kind of weird. Though I?ll admit I said that about the bobcats because I didn?t want to go look for a fake machete in the jungle during summertime (besides my sword is in the shop, I?m having blood stains removed.) BTW. don?t spread that around about being afraid of bobcats, my reputation, you know.*

 

sorry, the bad guys have all alreafy seen it! they know about your scardiness(is that even a word? heehee) i guess youll have to walk the plank anyway to get away.....without the rum!

 

*A few days ago Helen was interviewed by Charlie Rose. It turned out to be an interview of April 2008. I was disappointed, I had thought it was more recent. It?s not so easy to think of Helen and not think of MissB of Scotch at the same time. On how to find the truth of oneself Helen said, ?Well, not by looking for it,? which I found kind of cool. In case you never saw this interview, here is the link:*

 

oh you saw that too!!! yes i saw it! actually i didn't even know it was on, until a friend of mine called me at the last second and told me to turn the channel to Charlie Rose. i was soooo excited to see her on there! but yes, i agree with you, it was a little disappointing since it was previously aired a couple months ahead of time. thank you for sending me the link, i would love to watch it again, Laffite!......

 

Helen definitely always give a good performance! a couple of her newest movies are going to be released in theaters soon! i cant wait to see them! you will like one of them called, The Tempest....It's Shakespear!

 

oh by the way, they played A Midsummer Night's Dream on the "Ovation" channel a couple weeks ago. it was the one with Judi Dench and Helen and Diana Riggs in it and i was so surprised to see it actually on the TV! ithought of you when i watched it! what was the year again? was it 1968 or 1969? i forget.

 

have a good day, mon pirate!

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*Oh how sweet*

*You know very well how to tweet.*

 

Are you calling me a boid?

 

*The cake was oh so scrumptious*

*Scrumptious as a cherry peach parfait*

 

Your poems are delicious!

 

*okay, so i borrowed some parts to the Chitty Chitty Bang Bang song "Truly Scrumptious", but it still comes from the heart, silly pirate. heehee!*

 

It may come from the heart but it makes me think of the palate.

 

*they might want to frame your poem in comparison to mine silly. heehee!*

 

I don't think so. Your poem has a cherry peach parfait in it. 'Course mine has a little butterscotch in it ;)

 

*as for the rum......where did you fin it?*

 

Well, now, never you mind.

 

*i must not have hidden it enough!*

 

As RickyR would say, "You dint."

 

*golly gee, we cant have you going dancing around a campfire crazily singing silly songs!.......*

 

You're right, I'll leave that to one of those warrior queens you used to talk about. Now, who was that again? Dionne something?...Or maybe our wild-eyed Helena, remember her?

 

*heehee! no, no, no you wont change my mind, the rum is gone!*

 

But I have it...and this time no one is going to steal it. It's mine, all mine...muwahahaha...and no one's going to find it...,muwahahahahaI...I hope. :D

 

*oh, i thought your fake machete was magical. heehee! apparently it isnt.*

 

You're right, it isn't. It's just a run-of-the-mill fake machete. And it doesn't work very well. I went to cut someone's eyeballs out and the blade didn't work because it's made of rubber. In the midst of battle I had to pull out one of my poems to read. My poems are so bad that my adversaries just faint away in disgust. I win more battles that way.

 

*sorry, the bad guys have all alreafy seen it! they know about your scardiness(is that even a word?*

 

It wasn't in my pirate dictionary but pirates don't know many words. For instance, we don't know what the word fear means...except when we are around bobcats or wily young adventuresses who steal rum ;)

 

*thank you for sending me the link, i would love to watch it again, Laffite!......*

 

Your welcome. I enjoyed the interview. She seems so regular. She's not entirely comfortable being called Dame. She has a great personality. I liked her remarks about playing the Queen.

 

*oh by the way, they played A Midsummer Night's Dream on the "Ovation" channel a couple weeks ago. it was the one with Judi Dench and Helen and Diana Riggs in it and i was so surprised to see it actually on the TV! ithought of you when i watched it! what was the year again? was it 1968 or 1969? i forget.*

 

Oh good! I remember we talked about that a while back. I think you said you acquired the tape...or dvd. But it's great that it showed up on TV. I posted some make-shift screen caps with my camera back then. Here is one of them:

 

midph04.jpg

 

Helen with a dirty face...and she still looks good.

 

*i cant wait to see them! you will like one of them called, The Tempest....It's Shakespear!*

 

I'll look forward to that. Thanks for the tip.

 

*have a good day, mon pirate!*

 

Et toi aussi, mon amie

 

:)

 

laffite

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Ahem...

 

Frank Grimes,

I've been meaning to ask you something lately.

 

Succeed02

 

 

Well, I don't think you've been getting the attention you deserve around here at least. All these girls have been ignoring you lately. It's like you don't exist or something. In your own thread even.

 

Succeed04

 

So I think I've come across something that may be helpful.

 

Succeed03

 

 

This picture is supposed to make you not only irresistable to females but make the women obedient and worshipful in the manner deserving of man such as yourself. And it says "Yes, you, too, can learn."

 

Succeed01

Look at "Happy Frank"!

 

 

I think you should give it a look. ASAP. Putting a Ford Film (GAD!) on your "1920s Favorites" list won't help you. Plus the co-stars are quite an eye-opener.

 

Succeed-with-Girls_poster

To see the whole thing, click on the thumbnail.

 

Good Luck - and have fun!

 

Kyle (Bracing for them to come after me!) In Hollywood

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You are genius, Kylefornia! That really got a nice laugh out of me. I was not expecting

such silliness. :D

 

Frank Grimes, I've been meaning to ask you something lately.

 

Uh-oh. This is not going to go well. Not at all.

 

Well, I don't think you've been getting the attention you deserve around here at

least. All these girls have been ignoring you lately. It's like you don't exist or

something. In your own thread even.

 

Be careful! The only attention I attract is negative. I've been slapped, strangled, and

stabbed in the neck many times over while being told "you're mean!" I'm the mean

one? Me? I can't help it if John Ford is a hack or Gary Cooper wears lipstick.

 

So I think I've come across something that may be helpful.

 

You think I need help? Is it that obvious? Sigh. All right, whaddya got?

 

This picture is supposed to make you not only irresistable to females but make

the women obedient and worshipful in the manner deserving of man such as

yourself. And it says "Yes, you, too, can learn."

 

Obedient and worshipful? Woman? Really? Well, I guess there's always a first time. I'll

"learn," all right.

 

Look at "Happy Frank"!

 

Ohhh, the heck with 'em! I'm looking at the other two!

 

I think you should give it a look.

 

I'm looking! I'm looking!

 

ASAP.

 

You do know who you're talking to, right?

 

Putting a Ford Film (GAD!) on your "1920s Favorites" list won't help you.

 

You're right about that. My entire list could be Ford and Coop and I'd still finish

last. So it goes.

 

Plus the co-stars are quite an eye-opener.

 

Why do I think all of those "co-stars" are petitioning to get off that poster, "ASAP"?

 

Kyle (Bracing for them to come after me!) In Hollywood

 

At least you won't be a sucker and select a Coop film to show on TCM. I know you're not

that foolish. :D We men are just plain stupid. It starts and ends with that... horribly.

 

I really enjoyed your "Minyas Gone Bad" posters on your thread. I never knew she was that

big of a star before she had her six kids. Amazing.

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*Be careful! The only attention I attract is negative. I've been slapped, strangled, and stabbed in the neck many times over while being told "you're mean!" I'm the mean one? Me? I can't help it if John Ford is a hack or Gary Cooper wears lipstick.*

 

Hey,

 

As the one dame around here who actually gives you props from time to time, Shiftless, I'm stamping my foot, (hear it hitting the floor) and demanding you buy me a scotch and water, pronto!

 

Coop had other attributes going for him that made the ladies overlook the lipstick. And Ford, even you have said nice things about him. Be careful what you say as Vic McLaglen will come around and beat you to a pulp just for thinking such thoughts, Captain darling.

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