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Movies are the answer


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*Divorzio all'italiana*

 

On a large country estate one winter morning in the 1950?s, the ladies of the house prepare for the holidays?as they have so many times before?until the master of the house is found in bed with a dagger in?

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NINE MEN

 

This was the limit! Every time they wanted to have some fun, the master saw to it that their fun was liberally peppered with distress. Now what where they going to do with nine corpses? They talked it out over cranberries and plum pudding-making. They would simply include the corpses in the holiday meal. But first they had to....

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*Holiday in Havana*

 

Veda thought of herself as a scamp, but others mostly thought she was insufferable. In prison for murder, she didn?t make many friends and found herself assigned to laundry detail where her days were spent washing?

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*Easter Parade*

 

As Jim stared unhappily at the Thanksgiving turkey on the table in front of him, Mamie offered common sense and homespun wisdom. Jim was still missing Linda, feeling sorry for himself, and in no mood to listen to?

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HIT!

 

His usual answer to anything that annoyed him was to hit and hit hard. That got him in a lot of trouble in the past, even being ordered into anger management classes. But he was still quick to anger and slow to cool. His new response to this was going to be to...

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NOUS SOMMES TOUS ASSASSINS

 

That dittie certainly perked up the dozing audience...it was something they all related to. In no time they were all singing along and enjoying themselves. When the show ended, Jimmy and Mary were escorted out of the cell block and into a waiting limo. As they sped along the thruway, Jimmy was taken with the odd notion that...

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*Let Us Be Gay*

 

Once Sally began learning to read she was thrilled to discover that Dick and Jane?s adorable little sister was named Sally, just like her! She was so excited she went home and suggested the family dog be renamed Spot. Her mother, pregnant and irritable, said?

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PARADISE FOR TWO

 

But now that he had returned to her, she was trying her hardest to reverse the affection she felt for Hornellius into a true love for Karell. Her efforts backfired and soon she was packing a gun and ready to shoot to kill. Which she did on a fateful night. When the police came, he told them...

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Sorry, Wrong Number

 

After Dorothy had returned to Kansas, she figured that the story of her adventures in OZ might make a good movie, so she embellished it a bit and peddled the script to a Hollywood studio. She figured that she might make enough money to finally get away from that farm and those old people. The studio brass told her that it needed a catchy title. She thought about it for a while and came up with "

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