scsu1975 Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 I suppose film historians can sort through this mess to determine what actually happened. As far as I can tell, some imbeciles took a 1950s semi-entertaining piece of trash called The Madmen of Mandoras, then added about 20 minutes of footage from either the late 60s or early 70s, which was *total* trash. The result is a high body count, no continuity, night turning into day and vice-versa, a lot of bad acting, and Hitler's head in a jar. The film opens with a scientist being followed by the Blues Brothers. His car explodes, so the boss at CID Headquarters assigns his top agent, Vic, to investigate. This is part of the CID's new policy: "Walk softly and carry a big Vic." I don't know what CID stands for, but the "I" definitely does not stand for intelligence. Vic is an idiot, and so is his new partner, played by a chick who looks bad in a miniskirt (this is the new footage, if you haven't guessed). In short order, the boss, Vic, and the chick buy the farm, leaving only the Blues Brothers. Then the 1950s movie starts, with film of an elephant collapsing from the effects of "G-gas." Must be the peanuts. Another scientist is kidnapped, so the entire (original) cast moves to Mandoras. At this point, I got lost trying to figure out who was who and who was a Nazi and who was not. I'm pretty sure this Hitler dude was not a nice guy, although at times, he rolled his eyes like Jerry Colonna. Hitler has a line of dialogue, so his vocal cords are still intact. There are a few familiar faces in the cast (the old footage, not the new footage). Nestor Paiva shows up as a Police Chief who may or may not be on the level. Carlos Rivas plays a dual role, and seems to mysteriously appear from nowhere in almost every scene. John Holland, best known for playing Alice Kramden's boss on one episode of "The Honeymooners," appears as the scientist ... that is, the scientist in the old footage. The guy playing the scientist in the new footage is a nobody, along with the boss, Vic, and the chick. This film had me on the edge of my seat ... my toilet seat, that is. Carlos Rivas has an attack of gastritis. Dennis Farina, without his platform shoes. Carlos Rivas has another attack of gastritis. The other actors are not thrilled. Carmen Miranda stars in I was a Mambo Dancer for the Third Reich. Totie Fields waits to make a phone call, unaware that Carlos Rivas has been put on hold - forever. Is it just me, or are there only two people in this bar who realize there is a dead guy on the floor? This is what happens when the set painters are dyslexic. Adolf goes trick-or-treating. Adolf's meat gets tenderized. The producer's reaction when the three screenwriters pitch the idea for this film. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HollywoodGolightly Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 > {quote:title=scsu1975 wrote:}{quote} > Carmen Miranda stars in I was a Mambo Dancer for the Third Reich. > > http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii310/scsu1975/untitled5-17.jpg> That could have made for a great musical all on its own. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joefilmone Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 Tarantino should remake this masterpiece! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HollywoodGolightly Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 I thought he already had? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scsu1975 Posted September 5, 2009 Author Share Posted September 5, 2009 > {quote:title=joefilmone wrote:}{quote} > Tarantino should remake this masterpiece! Some things are better left alone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HollywoodGolightly Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 Yes, but nobody told him that before he remade Inglorious you-know-what. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bronxgirl48 Posted December 22, 2009 Share Posted December 22, 2009 I was trying to figure out what Meathead and Gloria ("Vic" and "Toni") were doing from what appeared to be the early 1970's in that amateurish, atrocious added footage. The original movie was like a really bad OUTER LIMITS episode. I also couldn't understand what the heck was going on at any given moment. The shots of the pickled Hitler were actually kind of creepy, heaven help me. It brought to mind Lon Chaney, Jr.'s smirks as the monster in THE GHOST OF FRANKENSTEIN. I did recognize Alice's boss, lol. It's a good thing Adolph's head wasn't introduced to Virginia Leith's from THE BRAIN THAT WOULDN'T DIE. She was power-hungry too. Edited by: Bronxgirl48 on Dec 22, 2009 5:27 AM Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scsu1975 Posted December 22, 2009 Author Share Posted December 22, 2009 > {quote:title=Bronxgirl48 wrote:}{quote} > I did recognize Alice's boss, lol. Ah yes, Mr. Amico. What this film needed was Ralph Kramden inventing some money-making scheme - selling pickled Hermann Goering, for instance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bronxgirl48 Posted December 22, 2009 Share Posted December 22, 2009 HAHAHAHA! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8llorcJ2TlI Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HarryLong Posted March 5, 2010 Share Posted March 5, 2010 Is it me or did they get the swastika reversed? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scsu1975 Posted March 5, 2010 Author Share Posted March 5, 2010 > {quote:title=HarryLong wrote:}{quote} > Is it me or did they get the swastika reversed? It's not you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CineMaven Posted March 6, 2010 Share Posted March 6, 2010 Well this is going on my list of films to watch. Then reading your review will make a lot of sense to me and provide lots of laughs, I'm sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CineMaven Posted March 6, 2010 Share Posted March 6, 2010 By the by...was it pickled?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scsu1975 Posted March 6, 2010 Author Share Posted March 6, 2010 > {quote:title=CineMaven wrote:}{quote} > By the by...was it pickled?? No, but German Herring was ... or was that Herman Goering? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HollywoodGolightly Posted March 6, 2010 Share Posted March 6, 2010 Sounds like something that would go well... with Sauerkraut. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValentineXavier Posted March 7, 2010 Share Posted March 7, 2010 Woody Allen saved Hitler's nose... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HollywoodGolightly Posted March 7, 2010 Share Posted March 7, 2010 Really? How he'd do that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValentineXavier Posted March 8, 2010 Share Posted March 8, 2010 It's in *Sleeper*. They are trying to clone Hitler, from his nose. Woody takes it hostage, pointing a gun at it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HollywoodGolightly Posted March 8, 2010 Share Posted March 8, 2010 Gosh, I can't believe I'd forgotten that. It's been ages since I watched Sleeper, maybe it's time I see it again... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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