ValeskaSuratt Posted August 15, 2012 Share Posted August 15, 2012 *Gunga Dinner at 8* This epicurean epic about the Gastro-Indian Wars asks the burning question “What if they threw a war and somebody dropped the aspic ?” The all-star cast includes Billie Burke as flighty, flustered Lt. Colonel Whimsyfingers who can’t quite muster the troops for her curry dinner party, Wallace Beery, Victor Mc- Laglen and Jean Harlow as a trio of bawdy, bare-fisted platinum-blondes, and the irrepressible Marie Dressler as Burke’s faithful cook, Gunga Dinah, who saves the day by serving Sam Jaffe over saffron rice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValeskaSuratt Posted August 19, 2012 Share Posted August 19, 2012 *Some Things Gotta Itch* For the title role of a villainous Venusian vegetable trying to stay cool during a sweltering New York summer, Marilyn Monroe went totally “Method” by studying her chef’s salad every day at lunch. Though her performance was widely dismissed as "meatless," Variety said her death scene (pictured above) “simmered to perfection.” Of the recent discovery and restoration of nearly 30 minutes of scenes in which Marilyn swims naked in an Arctic ****, Leonard Maltin enthused "Marilyn brings new meaning to both 'Birdseye view' and 'frozen niblets.'" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bildwasser Posted August 24, 2012 Share Posted August 24, 2012 Look Cronauer, I'm with you. I'd rather listen to nails on a blackboard than to Bobby Goldsboro, but the colonel likes him, so you're going to play Honey until the record wears out. Now that's an order. *Good Morning, Vientiane* After a night of heavy drinking, hot shot DJ Adrian Cronauer thinks he is on his way to Saigon, but is actually dropped off in Vientiane, Laos, one country over. But nobody there seems to care and he starts spinning discs at a radio station. Things go swimmingly, until one morning Cronauer plays Paul Revere and the Raiders and Gary Puckett and the Union Gap back to back. The natives riot and Cronauer makes a quick exit, finally winding up where he wanted to be, Saigon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LonesomePolecat Posted August 24, 2012 Share Posted August 24, 2012 Wow there are some hilarious titles on this thread, but GUNGA DINNER AT 8 made my day. So funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValeskaSuratt Posted August 26, 2012 Share Posted August 26, 2012 *How To Bury a Millionaire* Try as they might, neither Marilyn Monroe nor co-stars Betty Grable and Lauren Bacall managed to breathe life into their roles as grave- robbing gold-diggers who roam Manhattan by midnight in search of well-preserved sugar-daddies. As a result, Marilyn’s lone foray into low-budget horror died a natural death at the box office despite such “to-die-for” musical numbers as We’re Just Two Little Ghouls (From Little Rock), Every Baby Needs a Dead Dead Daddy and After You Get What You Want You Stop Breathing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BaggarVance Posted August 26, 2012 Share Posted August 26, 2012 THE SODA FOUNTAINHEAD is my favorite of the recent entries. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misswonderly3 Posted August 26, 2012 Share Posted August 26, 2012 Valeska's got a real talent for this. *"How to Bury a Millionaire"* ? I couldn't stop laughing ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misswonderly3 Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 *3:10 to You, Ma* A struggling farmer seeks to make the 3:10 train to his home town, in order to have one last visit with his saintly mother, whose health is failing. His attempts to catch the fateful train are blocked by a lawless gunman who will stop at nothing to prevent the farmer from carrying out his filial duty. The gunman is simply jealous, because his memories of his maternal parent include random beatings and maudlin drunken ramblings about how difficult it is for a saloon girl to bring up a child in the Wild West, and how it's not her fault that she can't remember who his father is. to[/i]Yuma.jpg] Look, one more "I saw your mother last night" joke, and you'll have a face nobody's mother could love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValeskaSuratt Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 *3:10 to You, Ma ... !* Oh, wonderful MissWonderly ... like you, I eschew the "LOL" even when -- as now -- I am ... (LOLing). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValeskaSuratt Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 *Lady Hamilton For a Day* Hollywood snickered when Vivien Leigh was replaced by venerable May Robson as the disgusting old denizen of 18th Century London’s lowest gutters, desperate to seal her daughter’s marriage to Prince Schlitzmaltz of Milwaukia, who's saved when some Runyon- esque royalists pass her off as "Lady Hamilton." The sterling British supporting cast includes Womley Wittlebottom as Dave la Duc de Dufus, Alan Mopbrow as the Baron of Brooklyn, and DeManda Keylight as Roxy "Boom Boom" Sanchez. Tinsel Town's tittering, however, turned into catatonic shock when rumors of romance emerged between one-eyed warrior Lord Hamilton (Laurence Olivier) and his creakily coquettish co-star. Robson confided in Hedda Hopper -- off the record, she thought -- “Dearie, I feel just like an old box of Cracker Jack -- I may be stale but some kid still wants the prize !” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bildwasser Posted September 7, 2012 Share Posted September 7, 2012 Allison, I'd like you to come upstairs with Mr. Rossi and me for a moment. There's something he learned about in France called a menage a trois. I believe down in Boston they call it a three way. *Payday Place* Things have changed quite a bit over the last fifty years in the little New England village. The Harrington mill has long since closed, the few remaining jobs outsourced to Bhutan. Rodney Harrington II now runs a string of payday loan stores. Selena manages the Victoria Secrets store in the Peyton Place Galleria. Ron Rossi is a minor porno star, most famous for his flick Hard as Granite State. It was recently discovered that old Doc Swain was glad to provide an abortion if the price was right. And Allison MacKenzie? She never quite fulfilled her fantasy of becoming a writer. She now edits microwave owner's manuals for GE. Oh, the dreams of yute. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValeskaSuratt Posted September 8, 2012 Share Posted September 8, 2012 Verging on genius is one thing, Bildwasser, but making it look so effortless ... That's the hardest I've laughed since Pola claimed Rudy proposed to her before he died. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bildwasser Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Thanks, but genius or verging had nothing to do with it. I'm enjoying your posts very much, very funny, including the customized photos. As much as I get a kick out of Peyton Place, it's a pretty easy and large target, almost as large as.....never mind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SansFin Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 These are brilliant! I believed this thread had been played out. I am very happy to see it is stronger and more creative now! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValeskaSuratt Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 h2. Whatever Happened to Billy Jack? After a few too many peace rallies, biker fights and too-tight headbands, Billy Jack tries living quietly with his invalid sister, Jilly Jack, only to have their sibling rivalry explode into a brutal and bloody turf war. Despite scenes of pathos – as when Tom Loughlin, singing “One Tin Soldier,” dissolves into tears after a mirror reveals his days as a young, girlish Green Beret are long gone – the film was heavily criticized for its violence. According to Newsweek’s David Ansen, “The indignities heaped upon the poor, jiggle-wheeled Jilly go way beyond dead rats on lunch trays and include several karate chops, a pistol-whip- ping and an attack with a samurai sword. Fortunately, though armed only with lethally padded shoulders and razor-sharp eyebrows, Joan Crawford gives as good as she gets.” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
casablancalover2 Posted September 11, 2012 Share Posted September 11, 2012 Still laughing at Robson's quote to Hedda Hopper: > Robson confided in Hedda Hopper -- off the record, she thought -- ?Dearie, I feel just like an old box of Cracker Jack -- I may be stale but some kid still wants the prize !? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misswonderly3 Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 *STARK (naked) PASSAGE* An escaped prisoner, convicted of murdering his wife, seeks to prove his innocence by finding the true killer. Assisted by a beautiful rich young woman, a loquacious cab driver, and a bulldog posing as a defrocked surgeon, the man decides to disguise himself by removing all his clothes and conducting the investigation "starkers", as the rich girl calls it. His reasoning for this is that nobody will be looking at his face, the only part of his body that the masses would recognize. So...You're planning to clothe yourself entirely in bandages, and then gradually strip them away? Kind of a stripped-down search operation, eh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValeskaSuratt Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 A publicity shot from STARK (naked) PASSAGE reveals that the heavy-drinking, middle-aged Bogie was in amazing shape ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonOfUniversalHorror Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 > {quote:title=ValeskaSuratt wrote:}{quote} > A publicity shot from STARK (naked) PASSAGE reveals that the heavy-drinking, > middle-aged Bogie was in amazing shape ! LOL...not to burst bubbles, but that's Bogie's head stuck onto the body of Peter (Mission Impossible) Lupus from Lupus' Playgirl shoot from the mid-70's. :^0 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValeskaSuratt Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 > {quote:title=SonOfUniversalHorror wrote: > }{quote}LOL...not to burst bubbles, but that's Bogie's head stuck onto the body of Peter (Mission Impossible) Lupus from Lupus' Playgirl shoot from the mid-70's. :^0 To those of us with cast iron bubbles, it's called "Hollywood Magic." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bildwasser Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 Just goes to show it's never too early to consider purchasing a bro, even if it's only a training bro. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misswonderly3 Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 Isn't there a pic of Mr. Brent wearing something that looks very much like a bro, on his eponymous thread? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hibi Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 LOL. I think we discussed the BRO, but I dont think George wore one (on that thread). There was a pic of him in a top and bottom swim suit........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ValeskaSuratt Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 *Let’s Make Lumps* Few remember that after Shemp Howard’s untimely death in 1955 and before Joe Besser was hired to replace him, Marilyn Monroe stepped in for a single Three Stooges film as “Curvy Jo.” Shooting was problematic from the first take when Marilyn, determined to pull no punches with her pugilistic co-stars, reflexively kneed Moe Howard in the groin. Further problems erupted when Monroe insisted on the presence of her drama coach, Natasha Lytess, whose background in Stanislavsky proved poor preparation for the intricacies of face-slapping, eye-poking and nose-bonking. Adding insult to potentially permanently dis- abling injury, the film was initially released to coincide with Marilyn's Fox "comeback" film under the title *Bust Stop*. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LonesomePolecat Posted September 12, 2012 Share Posted September 12, 2012 *Stark Passage* remake from 2012: To escape the poilice, Humphrey Bogart gets plastic surgery, which turns him into Iron Man. (Get it?? Get it?) Edited by: LonesomePolecat on Sep 12, 2012 5:11 PM Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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