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RICH'S B (AND WORSE) JUVENILE DELINQUENT THREAD


scsu1975
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Hey Joe, thanks for posting that! I will keep an eye out for that one - looks horrible. I'm sure the poster is better than the movie, as is usually the case. Feel free to post others you have.

 

I am in Dallas for a week (99 degrees when I flew in - blech), so I will get back to this thread when I return.

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Teenage Devil Dolls (1955) aka One Way Ticket to Hell
Directed by B. Lawrence Price, Jr.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K0SAd0_C3ak

If one is to believe imdb.com, this film was a Master's thesis for the director while he was a film student at UCLA. I would suspect that after the thesis committee screened this, they suggested the alternate title, based upon their viewing displeasure. I have no idea if Price ever got his Master's Degree, but he did manage to marry Anne Francis, so I give him high grades for that.

The film revolves around the character of Cassandra, a teen who gets mixed up with a bunch of bikers who smoke reefers. Most of the bikers look like nerds, and, of course, everyone knows that nerds smoke grass every chance they can. (I started, immediately after viewing this film.) Somehow, Cassandra manages to marry a decent boy named Johnny Adams, but can't stay away from the weed and the bikes. Despite Johnny getting her a dog and her doctor giving her sleeping pills (nice move, Doc - your name ain't Kevorkian, is it?), she falls deeper into the dumper. In several scenes, she crawls along the ground, impersonating David Hasselhoff sans the hamburger. Eventually, she hooks up with a chubby heroin addict, various sundry sordid characters, and finally, a Latin American junkie, played by director Price. Price gives the best performance in the film, which isn't saying much. Price's father, oddly enough named B. Lawrence Price, Sr., appears in the film as Cassandra's stepfather. The Johnny character simply disappears from the film, as well as the dog.

There is no dialogue, just narration by "Lt. David Jason." This puts the film on a par with The Beast of Yucca Flats, but at least Beast had Tor Johnson around for laughs.

For 1955, maybe this was strong stuff, but today, it sucks canal water. It is basically a one-hour documentary, not nearly as entertaining as those 1950s educational films which tell you to avoid restrooms along the highways, what to do on a first date, how to practice good hygiene, and how to kiss your a** goodbye when the commies bomb us.




Harvey Lembeck smokes a joint.
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The first day of school on Easter Island.
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If your family looked like this, you'd be a junkie too.
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The Border Patrol tracks down giant Mexican ants that entered the country illegally.
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Peter Fonda gives a bloated Joan Bennett a fix.
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Richard Dix has a cameo, despite being dead for six years.

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Not drug withdrawal, just a reaction to the latest Lady Gaga song.
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Rich, your captions are so funny! :)

 

I remember when I was a teenager in high school in the late 1950s, and back then even our hoodlums were polite and neatly dressed, and they weren?t insane. They weren?t at all like today?s youth.

 

Today?s youth:

http://24ktstyle.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/punks460.jpg

 

http://missopinion.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/gangs.jpg

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To honor TCM's juvenile delinquent night, here is a little-known (deservedly so) film short.

Boy With a Knife (1956)
Directed by Laslo Benedek
Narrated by Richard Widmark

http://www.archive.org/details/Boywitha1956

Hilariously awful relic of the 50s, this short subject stars Chuck Connors as a guy who tries to help out a gang of morons.

Connors plays Bud Williams, "Group Work Specialist," who mysteriously shows up at a hot dog stand and tries to make nice with the kids. (Tip to teenagers -  if a tall strapping guy in a crew cut named "Bud" drives up in a wooden station wagon and suggests you join his club, call a cop, even if the guy looks like "The Rifleman.") The kid with the most problems is Jerry, who tries to settle every argument by pulling out his switchblade. We learn the reason for Jerry's aggression in the opening scene. His stepmother is a witch, and she has kitty-whipped his father, played by veteran character actor Arthur Space. Space puts the "uss" in "w***." Think Jim Backus in Rebel Without a Cause, only ten times wimpier. But at least Space is not reduced to wearing an apron.

Bud eventually coerces the kids into playing baseball, ping pong, and other exciting games. However, spending time with the kids does not make Bud wiser. When another kid picks on Jerry, Jerry pulls his knife for the 432nd time, then runs off, which sparks some intelligent dialogue:

Kid #1: "Wow, he was really gonna let me have it."
Bud: "This is serious, fellas."
Kid # 2: "Yeah, let's do something."
Bud: "Let's go find him."

They do find Jerry, who is redecorating his house with his knife. Jerry's father finally grows a pair, and almost everyone lives happily ever after. Enraged by the bad narration he is handed, Widmark ties the stepmother to a wheelchair and hurls her down a flight of stairs. Then Connors is gunned down by Burl Ives.




The Boys Club of America presents The Blackboard Jungle.
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A short-lived 50s fad ... "exercise."
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Jerry's stepmother accuses him of growing breasts.
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Connors shows off his Buster Crabbe magic mold body shirt.
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Jerry tries his hand at upholstery, with disastrous results.
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Yeah, these guys would scare the crap out of anybody.
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*Yeah, these guys would scare the crap out of anybody.*

 

I don't know, when I used to wear my Ben Hogan-style Ivy cap on the golf course, people would run willy-nilly from me. Then again, it might have been my wildly-hooked drives.

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  • 1 month later...

The Black Rebels (1960) aka This Rebel Breed
Directed by Richard L. Bare

http://retrovision.tv/freevideo/black-rebels-the-1960/

You may want to take a shower after watching this film. It has something to offend everyone (especially those interested in the art of filmmaking).

Gerald Mohr plays a detective who sends two cops undercover at the local high school. The cops are played by Mark Damon and Douglas Hume. Their job is to find out who or what is causing racial disturbances at the school. Damon is supposed to pretend he is "half Mexican and Negro." The makeup man tries to convince us by giving Damon's face the George Hamilton look. Hume is just supposed to pretend he's a white guy. As is usual in films of this type, all the "kids" look about ten years older than they are supposed to be

There are three gangs at the school: the Royals (white dudes), the Ebonys (black dudes), and the Caballeros (Mexican dudes). For some strange reason, they just all can't get along. Damon tries to get in with the Caballeros, but he is shunned because he is part black. He can't get in with the Ebonys because he is part Mexican. Along the way, we are treated to racial slurs which would be excised from films today. And everybody packs a switchblade.

Rita Moreno plays a Mexican whose brother is the leader of the Caballeros. When her boyfriend is killed, suspicion falls on her brother (but we already know who the real culprit is). Moreno looks great; too bad she is stuck in this piece of crap - fortunately, West Side Story was just around the corner. Dyan Cannon (billed as Dianne) has a small but meaty role as a character named "Wiggles." Use your imagination. Here, Cannon looks uncannily like my favorite B-movie tramp, Yvette Vickers. The most repulsive character in the film is played by Richard Rust, who is the leader of the Royals. He is so low that he foists some marijuana on a couple of little black kids.

Oh, back to the plot. Turns out some fat guy is selling the grass to the schoolkids, with Rust's assistance. Tubby's theory is that if he can incite the schoolkids to violence, they will buy his stash to get high for the rumbles. This is what passes for entrepreneurship in the 1960s.

The final rumble involves the Royals, the Caballeros, the two undercover cops, plus Moreno and her onscreen father, played by character actor Jay Novello. The fat guy ends up handcuffed to a lawn jockey. Damon and Moreno make nice to each other. Mohr tells everyone to wise up.

Several scenes were obviously added to this film after its initial release. Most seem to involve Hume walking into a room unannounced and coming across some scantily clad dames making out with guys. My guess is that the film was then re-released to sleazy drive-ins. It should have been incinerated instead.


The two finalists in the George Chakiris lookalike contest.
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Dyan shows Gerald Mohr her Cannons.
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Have you ever wondered what Richard Conte would look like as a blonde punk?
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Detective Frank Cannon (no relation to Dyan) stumbles onto the set.
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Liberace's house gets trashed.
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You thought I was making that up, didn't you?
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"Repeat after me, Rita. I will forget this film. I will forget this film."
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  • 2 months later...

The Bloody Brood (1959)
Directed by Julian Roffman

http://retrovision.tv/freevideo/bloody-brood-the-1959/

Amazingly dull and stupid film, running around 68 minutes, possibly of some interest to Peter Falk fans.

Falk plays Nico, who leads a gang of morons (we used to call them beatniks). An old geezer vapor locks in a bar. Falk waxes poetic over the body and remarks "no name, not even a number ... that makes him a perfect square." No, that would be 1, 4, 9, 16, etc. Now Falk gets the brilliant idea that he can control death by deciding who and when somebody will die. So he invites a delivery boy into one of his wild parties and feeds him a burger containing ground glass. This sparks an immediate outcry in San Francisco, where the Town Council demands that fast food restaurants stop selling Happy Meals high in silicon. Since Ronald McDonald has an airtight alibi (he was in a motel room with Mayor McCheese), the police are stumped.

Enter Jack Betts, the very poor man's Clark Gable, who plays the victim's brother. In roughly ten minutes, he figures out where the crime took place. He tries to insinuate himself into Falk's inner circle, but stupidly carries his I.D. which is promptly lifted by some of Falk's gang. His cover being blown, along with his acting career, we see the obligatory beat down of Betts, which, oddly, makes him look even more like Gable. Meanwhile, in another part of town, the cops are shaking down the Wizard of Fries.

Eventually some of the gang turn on Falk and corner him in an alleyway. Is this the end of Nico?

Falk is okay, but early on, he acts like a robot (think of a cross between Al Gore and Vince Edwards). Even Edward Brophy had better neck movement. Betts is okay as well, but he's no Clark Gable. The few females in the cast are not worth mentioning.

I suppose if you like bongos and an occasional poem, you might enjoy this. Personally, I'd skip it and head to Burger King ... but avoid the Whopper.




"That's all the questions for now. Sorry to have bothered you. Just routine questioning.
Oh, maybe one last thing. Have you seen my raincoat?"
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Charlie Weaver collapses after failing to answer a question correctly on The Hollywood Squares.
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"Hey Daddy-O, what are you doin' with Columbo's raincoat?"
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Bristol Palin goes wild on Dancing With the Stars.
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A short-lived 50s fad ... bongo messaging.
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:( Boy, did this anybody-but-Johnsonite need a good laugh and this thread did it. I remember when most of these films came out (56 to 58) but was judged too young for them. From the synopses you all provided, I can't tell if that's good or bad but my curiosity was aroused. I've only seen Drag Strip Girl but might consider the others if it's midnight or so and I'm out of a good chardonnay.

 

I can't remember the tile but Anne Francis, Anne Jckson, and Rosita Moreno(all in their first film) are in a reform school movie with Paul Henreid from about 52 or 53. It's poorly filmed but not half bad. TCM has shown it.

 

Hey, Johnson's a nice guy and I felt sorry for him when he kept comming in 2nd but this is getting to be like the 50's Yankees. There are a lot of deserving racers so spread it around. Again thats for turning the above into this. :)

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> {quote:title=wouldbestar wrote:}{quote}

> I can't remember the tile but Anne Francis, Anne Jckson, and Rosita Moreno(all in their first film) are in a reform school movie with Paul Henreid from about 52 or 53. It's poorly filmed but not half bad. TCM has shown it.

 

You're thinking of So Young, So Bad, which is fairly decent, but the print shown on TCM was pretty bad. Rita Moreno is particularly good in the film.

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> {quote:title=wouldbestar wrote:}{quote}

> I've only seen Drag Strip Girl but might consider the others if it's midnight or so and I'm out of a good chardonnay.

>

 

I'd recommend a robust, spicy, old vines Zin with most JD films. If they have a lot of music, a Willamette Valley Pino Noir is a good choice. Unless you're having popcorn. In that case, stick to beer, preferably a lager. Stay away from the IPAs. They are awful with popcorn, or JD films.

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