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Ascotrudgeracer

Worst Film Title EVER!

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I hereby nominate an icky slated for airing Saturday:

"Quentin Durward" (1955)

Now really, doesn't that title make you want to buy a ticket? That was a selling point in '55?

Compare it to the BEST title: "I Wake Up Screaming."

Your turn, comrade posters...nominate!

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"The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-up Zombies" (1963)

 

Not only is that title bad, there is not enough room on most marguees to display it.

 

What I hate about some movies titles is when they don't match the movie or misleads you.

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Some people might have gone to see Quentin Durward (1955) because they were familiar with Sir Walter Scott's 1823 novel. The movie is only fair except for one amazing scene where Quentin Durward and the villian sword fight while hanging from bell ropes in a church steeple which is on fire; it's worth watching just for that scene.

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"The Electric Horseman" (1979). They were trying for a title that reminded people of "Rhinestone Cowboy," a 1975 hit song by Glen Campbell. They should have just paid the royalties to use "Rhinestone Cowboy."

 

"Remember the Night" (1940). It's a Christmas classic; it's on the list of my top 10 favorite films....but which night are they talking about? Christmas Eve? New Year's Eve? The night at Niagara Falls?

 

"Tarzan Finds A Son!" (1939). Fun adventure flick. A better title would have been "Son of Tarzan." "Tarzan Finds..." points to MGM's hypocrisy. Seven years earlier in "Tarzan, the Ape Man" (1932), they had directly implied that Tarzan and Jane were involved in a physical relationship. But now that the Production Code forbade the glamorization of out-of-wedlock pregnancies, MGM seemed to cower at even the suggestion of such a relationship. The film itself more than satisfied the standards of the Production Code, so why worry about inferences that might be taken from the title?

 

"Precious: Based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire" (2009). I infer (perhaps incorrectly) that author Ramona "Sapphire" Lofton is an egomaniac who insisted that her name be worked into the film's title.

 

"Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope" (1977). It's just "Star Wars."

 

"Abbott and Costello Go to Mars" (1953). They go to Venus.

 

Edited by: Wayne on Jun 3, 2011 10:36 AM

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Wayne wrote:

<< Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope" (1977). It's just "Star Wars." >>

 

Well back then "Star Wars" was all it was referred to, people really didn't pay that much attention to the episode. But remember that George Lucas was planning on a sequel (with the biggest hope of prequels) at the most because the movie at the time was a great big gamble. All other studios turned him down for the production of it and he barely got Episode IV finished in time.

 

George Lucas done something unique (I think) in that he started in the middle of the story, so his movie had to reflect that. Calling Episode V "The Empire Strikes Back", "Star Wars Part II" would not had been the second part of the entire story and would had caused confusion as well as criticism later on when he made Episode I "Star Wars - The Phantom Menace".

 

All episodes did have the big "Star Wars' logo at the beginning with John Williams loud dramatic theme always grabbing your attention. :)

 

About "Tarzan Finds a Son", what are you talking or thinking about? Here is the plot of the movie.

 

*A plane flying to Cape Town carrying a young couple and their baby, crashes in the jungle. Everyone on the plane dies, except for the baby who is rescued by Cheeta, Tarzan's chimpanzee. Tarzan and Jane adopt the child and name him "Boy". Five years later, a search party comes looking for Boy, because he is the heir to a fortune worth millions. Jane tries to help the search party and Boy goes back to civilization, against Tarzan's wishes.*

 

In a way Tazan did found a son symbolicly, his *adoptive son.* Criticising the title is sort of criticising the unselfish act of adoption.

 

Bless those who do adopt (by which our government made a nightmare to do! :( )

 

Edited by: hamradio on Jun 3, 2011 12:04 PM

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"Ghidora, the Three-Headed Monster (TO BE DELETED)"

 

I was terribly disappointed last night the actual movie title card didn't read that way. Talk about false advertising!

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> {quote:title=Wayne wrote:}{quote}

>

> "Precious: Based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire" (2009). I infer (perhaps incorrectly) that author Ramona "Sapphire" Lofton is an egomaniac who insisted that her name be worked into the film's title.

 

I thought Oprah, who produced the movie, had something to do with that....either way, that DID get to be incredibly annoying on the Oscars that years when every time the movie came up, they just HAD to read off that ridiculously overdone title. To ME it is simply "Precious".

 

> "Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope" (1977). It's just "Star Wars."

 

Wrong...once TESB came out, the first movie WAS retitled Episode IV: A New Hope. It is no longer titled simply "Star Wars". Each of the six movies begins with the title "Star Wars" on-screen, and continues with the crawl of which episode number and titles each one is....and that's part of each film's title.

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Incredeby Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living And Became Mixed Up Zombies, (ISCWSLABMUZ) was on TCM a couple of years ago. It's kind of boring.

 

I remember on an old WKRP episode Herb Tarlek talking about seeing a porno film called *Kiss Me Kick Me*. I don't think it exists. I'm not sure about the existance of *Snow White And The Seven Sailors.*

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One of the simplest, yet worst, has to be *Gigli*. The very few people who knew how to pronounce it might wrongly assume it was a biography of the tenor Beniamino Gigli.

 

At least it wasn't *Gigli: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire*.

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If you think about it, "It Happened One Night" is not a good title, because whatever happened took several days and nights. Also, another Claudette Colbert movie, "Three Came Home", gives away the ending with the title.

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I just found a badly named movie while going through my Directv guide.

"Into the Sun" (2005) the plot is actually about a former CIA agent uncovers a deadly plot while searching for the men responsible for an assassination and a kidnapping.

 

So the movie has absolutely *nothing* to do with a sci-fi mission to the Sun, the upcoming NASA "Solar Probe Plus" to study the sun's corona or a past documentary of an alternative way (to spare the marine life) of how to dispose of Osama Bin Laden's body. (a Vorlon burial :) )

 

It will make a nice name for a future Science Channel documentary of the upcoming solar probe.

 

Edited by: hamradio on Jun 3, 2011 10:41 PM

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> {quote:title=MilesArcher wrote:}{quote}

> If you think about it, "It Happened One Night" is not a good title, because whatever happened took several days and nights.

 

"It happened" was a 1930s movie code term meaning "they did it". It refers to xxx. So the title means "They Did it One Night", which, of course, was the last night, after the final scene faded out.

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> {quote:title=Ascotrudgeracer wrote:}{quote}

> I hereby nominate an icky slated for airing Saturday:

> "Quentin Durward" (1955)

 

I think you are right. That's about the worst film title ever.

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The Saga of the Viking Women and Their Voyage to the Waters of the Great Sea Serpent

 

Krakatoa: East of Java (it's actually west of Java)

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"Billy the Kid vs Dracula" was double billed along with "Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter."

 

This is not the worst titles but OMG how about posting it in a *Worst Movie* thread. Just to think they had the nerve to call the western "Heavens Gate" a turkey. At least that movie had a common sense plot.

 

The only thing else annoying in any theatre showing those so called ( oh my he's turning over in his grave) Billy the Kid movies is a cricket chirping.

 

The titles at least saves one spending their hard earn money!

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How about *I Sailed To Tahiti With An All Girl Crew*. I've never seen this film, but it was a staple

on low rent late tv in the 70's and 80's, (Detroit's Channel 62.)

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*Can Heironymus Merkin Ever Forget Mercy Humppe and Find True Happiness?*

 

This sounds like something the announcer would say at the end of a radio serial, exhorting listeners to tune in next week.

 

*Oh Dad, Poor Dad, Mama's Hung You in the Closet and I'm Feeling So Sad*

 

The title sounds like a cheap candidate for TCM Underground, but the filmmakers actually got Rosalind Russell to star.

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I second .....Mixed Up Zombies as the worst title ever and Remember the Night as the vaguest title for one of the best. As far as Star Wars I think the episode called "Attack of the Clones" is the dumbest ever-- sounds like a 1950s B-movie. Ick.

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> {quote:title=Ascotrudgeracer wrote:}{quote}

> I hereby nominate an icky slated for airing Saturday:

> "Quentin Durward" (1955)

 

It does help to hear it pronounced as Quentin Derwerd. But I think it would have received more attention had it been called "The Blue Knight of Normandy" or something like that.

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I can't challenge some of the bizarre offerings presented here. But ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET THE KILLER, BORIS KARLOFF? Is he a killer or an actor? DUDE, WHERE'S MY CAR? is pretty ridiculous. But the film seems to have found an audience. Maybe that lends it some credibility!

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Lets not forget Paul Newmans "The Effect of Gamma Rays on Man-in-the-Moon Marigolds"(1972). great movie but the title..well..ya know. Or how about Quackser Fortune Has a Cousin In The Bronx.....Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever... and BAPS... who would have ever thought Halle Berry would redeem herself with Monster's Ball and other great films....discounting CATWOMAN, of course!!

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Geeze, some of my very favorite film titles, listed as worsts! I like "Incredibly Strange... Zombies," I Dismember Momma," "Effects of Gamma Rays," "Oh, Dad, Poor Dad," and a few others... :P :p :)

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