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I'd Rather Stick Needles in My Eyes Than Watch.....


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Any of those horror films referred to as "torture porn." I don't even know the titles, nor do I really want to.

 

"I Spit On Your Grave" (1978), it was remade in 2010, followed by a sequel  It's about as bad as it gets - suiitable for the mentally disturbed.

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About 95% of the stupid "slasher" movies of the last 30 years or so.  About 95% of the films that have computer generated special effects.

I can't remember the name of it, but there was a "snuff" movie from abpit 1969 or 1970 whose poster outside the theater said:

 

"Filmed in South America----WHERE LIFE IS CHEAP!"

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I think the movie you're referring to was actually called 'SNUFF'.  It was a mish-mash of 2 different movies; like those Al Adamson movies of the 1960s (VAMPIRE MEN OF THE LOST PLANET, anyone?), but not directed by him.  I think 'SNUFF' was cobbled together by Michael and Roberta Findlay, but I could be wrong.        

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I'd rather stick needles in my eyes rather than watch South Pacific ever again.  I usually enjoy musicals (however, I like the ones that have more dancing rather than straight singing) anyway and I like Mitzi Gaynor.  However, this movie was so boring I couldn't stand it.  I was watching it thinking that it should almost be over and it was only 30 mins into it! For whatever reason, I watched the whole thing waiting for it to get better and it never did.  It only got worse somewhow.  What was up with the different colored filters to make the image blue, yellow, pink, etc?

 

I also second Tiki and cannot stand Kathryn Grayson and my the newest addition to my annoying actors list, Jeanette MacDonald.  I can't stand either of their singing.  I like Anchors Aweigh, because it stars two of my favorites: Gene Kelly and Frank Sinatra, but Grayson is so irritating.  I usually fast forward or go to the bathroom or get a snack, hit the mute button, anything to not hear her sing.  I just saw San Francisco a few weeks ago and Jeanette MacDonald's singing was relentless and equally annoying each and every time.  I kept watching hoping that a piece of debris would fall on her during the Great Earthquake, or that Clark Gable would punch her in the mouth or something, but no such luck, she just kept on singing.

 

I find Esther Williams irritating as well.  She's so stiff and dull.  Even her water routines aren't that interesting.  I'd much rather watch musicals starring the likes of Vera-Ellen or Ann Miller where they're dancing on dry land, not swimming around in water. 

 

I hate to say it, but I find Bubsy Berkeley's musical numbers tedious and boring.  The only thing that makes them interesting is that a lot of them are pre-code and thus, the chorus girls are usually a little scandalous (for the early 1930s), other than that, his routines are monotonous.

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Any movie with or about opera. It makes me grit my teeth until I want to scream. I can't listen to it more than a minute.

 

A big thank you to speedracer, as I have become more of a musical fan. Mainly the dancing ones. Holiday Inn and Singing in the Rain, On the Town. Really like Gene Kelly.

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Any movie with or about opera. It makes me grit my teeth until I want to scream. I can't listen to it more than a minute.

 

 

I assume there IS one little exception to this reaction of yours, now isn't there mockingbird???

 

(...you realize of course I'm talking about a certain movie starring three wacky brothers who create havoc within one of those operas) ;)

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I assume there IS one little exception to this reaction of yours, now isn't there mockingbird???

 

(...you realize of course I'm talking about a certain movie starring three wacky brothers who create havoc within one of those operas) ;)

AMADEUS wasn't bad either.  Perhaps a double bill some day?

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The last time I walked out of a movie was at a packed Leicester Square screening of Les Miserables (2012).

During Anne Hathaway's big, wretched For Your Consideration number I turned to my wife and said "there are still two hours to go."

Unfortunately, we had decided to sit in the middle of a very long third row of people so our exit was reminiscent of Robert Stack's "excuse me, excuse me" bit in To Be or Not To Be.

And just to rub salt into the wounds of those who were enjoying the film I discovered I had lost my scarf and had to make my way back to my seat and then out again while Hathaway belted out the last of her Oscar grabbing solo. 

I cannot fathom the attraction of musicals where every sentence is sung (I'm going to the front door now!!) and men strut about like pigeons with their chests and bottoms stuck out.

But I never get tired of looking at this satire ...

 

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I assume there IS one little exception to this reaction of yours, now isn't there mockingbird???

 

(...you realize of course I'm talking about a certain movie starring three wacky brothers who create havoc within one of those operas) ;)

Haha. Is it possible that you are referring to, oh say, A Night at the Opera??

Here's a jaw dropper for ya, I never seen any Marx Brothers movies. Not sure why. Saw Abbott and Costello, Three Stooges, Ma and Pa Kettle. When I was a kid our local tv station would run week long movies of them at 4pm. Next time they pop up on Tcm I will give it a whirl.

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Haha. Is it possible that you are referring to, oh say, A Night at the Opera??

Here's a jaw dropper for ya, I never seen any Marx Brothers movies. Not sure why. Saw Abbott and Costello, Three Stooges, Ma and Pa Kettle. When I was a kid our local tv station would run week long movies of them at 4pm. Next time they pop up on Tcm I will give it a whirl.

A night at the opera is the best one, in my opinion--followed by duck soup.

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Woody Allen?  Ooooh, you are brave - the furies will descend at any moment.

 

For me, it's anything with: Julie Andrews

                                          June Allyson

                                          Van Johnson

                                           Rock Hudson

Colorized films

99.9% of MGM musicals

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Oh, what the H e l l...

 

I'd Rather Stick Needles in My Eyes Than Watch.....

 

Bob Hope

Bing Crosby

Red Skelton

Jerry Lewis

John Wayne

Dustin Hoffman

Greta Garbo

Mickey Rooney

Shirley Temple

The Bowery Boys

James Bond

Howard Keel

Jose Ferrer

"Action" movies with juiced up actors and stupid special effects

"Adventure" movies set in western colonial possessions

Costume dramas

Hagiographic biopics

Historical dramas set in royal courts or Sherwood Forest

Disney movies other than Donald Duck cartoons

Sci-fi or space movies made after 1965

Teen idol movies

Beach bum movies

Bubble gum movies

Movies centered around swimming pools

Nature movies

95% of westerns other than the 30 minute pre-1957 TV series (The Lone Ranger, Wild Bill Hickok, and other such comic archetypes)

95% of musicals

90% of Hollywood war movies

90% of Doris Day

80% of Rock Hudson

100% of Doris Day with Rock Hudson

 

Jeez, I must be a real misanthrope.  Except that I've still managed to see thousands of films on TCM that I either loved or just enjoyed.  But nobody likes everything. :)

 

 

 

 

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Oh, what the H e l l...

 

I'd Rather Stick Needles in My Eyes Than Watch.....

 

Bob Hope

Bing Crosby

Red Skelton

Jerry Lewis

John Wayne

Dustin Hoffman

Greta Garbo

Mickey Rooney

Shirley Temple

The Bowery Boys

James Bond

Howard Keel

Jose Ferrer

"Action" movies with juiced up actors and stupid special effects

"Adventure" movies set in western colonial possessions

Costume dramas

Hagiographic biopics

Historical dramas set in royal courts or Sherwood Forest

Disney movies other than Donald Duck cartoons

Sci-fi or space movies made after 1965

Teen idol movies

Beach bum movies

Bubble gum movies

Movies centered around swimming pools

Nature movies

95% of westerns other than the 30 minute pre-1957 TV series (The Lone Ranger, Wild Bill Hickok, and other such comic archetypes)

95% of musicals

90% of Hollywood war movies

90% of Doris Day

80% of Rock Hudson

100% of Doris Day with Rock Hudson

 

Jeez, I must be a real misanthrope.  Except that I've still managed to see thousands of films on TCM that I either loved or just enjoyed.  But nobody likes everything. :)

And SOME people don't seem to like ANYTHING!  ;)

 

 

Sepiatone

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The last time I walked out of a movie was at a packed Leicester Square screening of Les Miserables (2012).

During Anne Hathaway's big, wretched For Your Consideration number I turned to my wife and said "there are still two hours to go."

Unfortunately, we had decided to sit in the middle of a very long third row of people so our exit was reminiscent of Robert Stack's "excuse me, excuse me" bit in To Be or Not To Be.

And just to rub salt into the wounds of those who were enjoying the film I discovered I had lost my scarf and had to make my way back to my seat and then out again while Hathaway belted out the last of her Oscar grabbing solo. 

I cannot fathom the attraction of musicals where every sentence is sung (I'm going to the front door now!!) and men strut about like pigeons with their chests and bottoms stuck out.

But I never get tired of looking at this satire ...

 

There was virtually nothing to like about that film.  I had not, previously, seen any version of it, so I was not basing my disdain for it, on any other version.  Since the film, I have seen two stage productions, I found to be excellent, with infinitely more talented people.  Or, I should say, people with infinitely more talent suited to that music!

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Any movie with or about opera. It makes me grit my teeth until I want to scream. I can't listen to it more than a minute.

 

A big thank you to speedracer, as I have become more of a musical fan. Mainly the dancing ones. Holiday Inn and Singing in the Rain, On the Town. Really like Gene Kelly.

Ever since I watched THE MUSIC MAN, THE SOUND OF MUSIC, and OLIVER! in the 1960s my fondest fantasy is to live in a musical world where every climactic moment is punctuated by an aria, a chorus, or a dance. My life has not been so tragic as to deserve Richard Wagner, but it has had enough drama to fit Richard Strauss just right.

Speaking of movies ye don't like, what do you think of that perplexing phenomenon that is MOVIES SO BAD THEY ARE GOOD? PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE could, with a little tweaking of the dialogue, serve as a quite witty parody of the science fiction of the 1950s. Generally speaking, however, I find such bombs unbearable to watch. I once watched ZABRISKIE POINT to understand why it was rated as one of the 50 Worst Films Of All Time; the reasons were painfully obvious almost from the very start.

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