Favorite Comedic Quotes in Old Films

[NickAndNora34]

1. Don Lockwood: Cosmo, call me a cab!

Cosmo Brown: Ok, you're a cab.

Singin' in the Rain (1952)

 

2. Bruce Baldwin: He's got a lot of charm.

Hildy Johnson: He comes by it naturally. His grandfather was a snake.

His Girl Friday (1940)

 

3. Judith: There's nothing like a cheerful letter from home. My pa got laid off, my sister's husband has left her, and one of my brothers slugged a railroad detective.

Stage Door (1937)

 

4.

Susan Vance: [watching George the dog dig up what they think is David's dinosaur bone] Oh, look, David, a boot.

David Huxley: [angrily] A boot.

[picks it up and makes like he's going to swing with it]

Susan Vance: Don't hit George, David.

David Huxley: I wasn't going to hit *George*!

Bringing up Baby (1938)

 

[Sepiatone]

What I hate about threads like these are, for instance, I'll see something on TV or in real life that'll remind me of some funny line I always liked from some old movie.

 

But when asked HERE in a thread, they seem to evaporate.

 

All I can come up with is:

 

Dorothy  How can you talk if you don't have a brain?

 

Scarecrow   I don't know.  But I've found that some people without brains do an AWFUL lot of talking!

 

(The Wizard Of Oz: 1939)

 

Sepiatone( the proof in the pudding) 

[speedracer5]

There are a couple quotes from The Thin Man that I always laugh at:

 

REPORTER: Say listen, is he working on a case?

NORA: Yes, he is.

REPORTER: What case?

NORA: A case of scotch, Pitch in and help him.

 

NORA: Waiter, will you serve the nuts?... I mean, will you serve the guests the nuts? 

 

Some Like it Hot

 

Jerry: I'm a man!

Osgood: Well, nobody's perfect.

 

Jerry: I'm engaged! 

Joe: Congratulations. Who's the lucky girl?

Jerry: I am!

 

Jerry: Now you've done it! Now you have done it!

Joe: Done what?

Jerry: You tore off one of my chests!

 

---

 

There are a bunch of other lines that I think are funny, but only because of how they're said.  Some lines aren't that funny on paper, but using the right sounding voice and inflection, some lines are a lot funnier than they probably would have been otherwise. 

[SansFin]

George Carey: You be careful, madam, or you'll turn my pretty head with your flattery.

Kay Wilson: I often wished I could turn your head - on a spit, over a slow fire.

I Love You Again (1940)

[faceinthecrowd]

"Excuse me, you're sitting on my prospectus."

 

--The Awful Truth

[NickAndNora34]

 

George Carey: You be careful, madam, or you'll turn my pretty head with your flattery.

Kay Wilson: I often wished I could turn your head - on a spit, over a slow fire.

I Love You Again (1940)

 

This is one of my favorite quotes. Ah, I love that movie. Now, I'm going to go watch it lol

[laffite]

Kitty: "Don't you think you should answer the door? They're going to break the knocker."

 

Lord Varney: "I guess they want to wake me up."

 

Kitty: "Well, somebody should."

 

Okay, you have to be there, but this came across rather nice.

[Renee234]

The Blues Brothers:

Elwood: It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a tank full of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and we're wearing sunglasses.

Jake: Hit it.

 

Frozen:

Olaf: Hi everyone. I'm Olaf and I like warm hugs!

 

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

Ace Ventura: If I'm not back in five minutes... just wait longer.

[jamesjazzguitar]

Just goes to show that what is 'old' is relative.